Knits

I know, I should be spacing this posts out so not to have great big gaps, but I’m all chatty from being cooped up I guess.

Actually, I’ve got a few thoughts on how my year is going. One word to sum it up is Crap. I know there were almost 4 months of the year before my sister died, but really only about two of those happened without the life events starting up so I have sort of forgotten about January and February — can’t really tell you a single thing that happened other than a couple of work-related meetings.

The start of March was all a bit weird with trying to figure out if I was going to the US and when, getting my new visa and passport back, packing up my life and storing it, and then leaving. It was a blur. Once I arrived in the US, well as I said previously, the time went dreadfully slow, especially in the beginning, but also at light speed. It was and always will be a weird moment of time. My year began in May when I returned to the UK.

I’m confused that it’s already July — I somehow missed the spring and the various markers in the calendar to let me know the year was progressing. I’m in a new job in a new city and feeling very unsettled. Just when I was beginning to feel a bit more secure in my job and get caught up I missed a week of work (combination of 2 days vacation and 3 days sick) which makes me feel very anxious and like I won’t catch up. I just feel like so much is slipping through the cracks right now.

I have so many emails I haven’t returned, projects I want to work on (knitting and otherwise), but some how I have no time. I come home and I piss around on the internet and then I realise it’s 8pm and I haven’t started dinner so I do that or I eat a bowl of cereal. Then I piss around a bit more and suddenly it’s 1130 and I should really be getting into bed. Too many of my nights go like this right now. I just lose track of time doing NOTHING. Seriously, nothing.

I know part of it is that some of the projects require me to sit and not necessarily concentrate, but be more work-like yet my current set up at home does not allow for that; it’s uncomfortable and inconvenient. There are so many things I want to be knitting. I want to finish a pair of freakin’ socks! I hate seeing all those WIPs in my Ravelry notebook. (A few aren’t going to get touched until I move and can unearth them.) Yet, I signed myself up for a KAL and it’s not like the sun will fall from the sky if I don’t start or complete said object this month, but I’d really like to give it a try. I’d also like to get my cardigan underway. And my mom’s blanket.

I think I need to do what I do best and make a list of all the things I want to do or need to do. It will actually make me feel less stressed about it, but then I am also likely to forgot things unless I keep that list visible as I taught myself years ago to write things down or else I’d get stressed out trying to remember too much. Now I have the problem that I barely remember anything if I don’t write it down.

I’m actually taking full advantage of all the personal and professional development courses my new employer offers. There are some things I’m required to take (things on annual appraisals and participating in interview panels), but there is a slew of other things I’ve signed up for: speed reading, memory and mind mapping, and I may sign up for the time management one if it’s not all about making Gantt charts.

Much of this post has been brewing for awhile now, but Debbie’s recent post on her Summer Wish List inspired me to put it out there — make myself accountable really. I want to do other things OUTSIDE the house like take an art or photography course, volunteer some time some where, but I am being lazy about it in some ways. I have found some courses I’d love to take, but they are not local and would require 90 minutes on the bus each way on a Saturday morning. I honestly don’t think I want to sign up to that. I want to start swimming again (I have been saying this for 2 years) especially since I don’t cycle daily now.

I really hope I can start living a life I want to live instead of just floating through it doing the bare minimum required of me…

All photos from Brussels.

I am clearly on the mend. Appetite is mostly back, I am craving chocolate and sweets again (before the thought of such things made me feel sick to my stomach), and I am feeling less tired. Hurrah. I did lose a few pounds thanks to mostly not eating for five days. Also, plain, boiled potatoes? BLAND. SO BLAND. Maybe tonight I can eat something with a wee bit of flavour. I’m even trying a small cup of coffee…

I have another blanket question totally unrelated to the one about my mom’s potential blanket… In November 2006 Kristal wanted me to show her how to knit. I went and bought her some yarn and needles and showed her. She was working on it, but never got very far. When I was cleaning up her room I found the yarn and needles and two teeny rectangles she’d made. Combine this with all the remnants of yarn from hats I made her and I’ve got a decent amount - not enough for a whole blanket, but a good starting point. My question is, being inexperienced as I am, these yarns are a variety of weights and fibres — acrylic mixes, alpaca, silk wool blends, etc — would it just be silly to try to make a blanket or something out of such a motley mix of weights and fibres? I’m okay w/ the handwashing bit (she says now). I think a log cabin may be the best way to go on this.

I made it out to the knitting group last night. We tried out a new venue that was nicer in terms of lighting, but it felt a bit anti-social because of the set up and very loud music. We will give it another go, but choose a different seating area.

This weekend I will spend knitting and relaxing. I hope to finish up a sock so I can have yet another lone sock. I signed up for a Interweave Sock-a-long (Rav Group) which is what it says on the tin — knit one of 3 chosen patterns this month (two of them are freely available). I want to get started on this so I can maybe actually knit a pair of socks in a month. God I am so slow.

I leave you with something good and something weird:

All photos are from Ghent. There are a few more in my Flickr set.

And that is almost the entire extent of knitting content for this post; hanks of Richard Wernekinck Garens Franse Landwol hung outside Stoffenidee in Ghent. I bought some to make cushion covers out of. The shop has a good range of yarn and fabrics.

The rest of the knitting content involves the blanket I’ve been considering for my mom. I asked her to go have a look at the Noro and she came back with four colourways she likes none of which are the natural one. I kind of wanted to keep the thing a surprise by saying “I’m knitting you something” and not tell her what or how big, but maybe I need to let her in on it and ask if she’d want a technicolour blanket that would require handwashing. There just doesn’t seem to be a good machine-washable substitute out there…

Regarding Trigger, thanks for all the sentiments. As of right now I do not plan on getting another cat (cats is more like it) until October at the earliest when I’ve moved into a new place. Even then I may wait until after the new year as I expect I will go to the US for Christmas and it’s a bit of a hassle to find someone to look after the cats or put them into a kennel.

So Belgium… I’ve been once before (I’m not going to count the overnight stay once even if it did involve going to the bar with inflated animal bladders hanging from the ceiling). This time it was a girls weekend - just me and A. We went out and drank beers, ate some food, wandered around, laughed and laughed and laughed, until she tried to kill me with the poisoned food, but then we still laughed some.

We headed to Ghent on Saturday. We woke up late, managed to catch the slow train, and then I had to work out how to get us into the town centre since she speaks French, but couldn’t figure out the pictures haha. We made it and right away we stumbled into a craft fair. I’m not talking the hokey craft fair of old where people sell toilet paper cosies and things made out of popsicle sticks. This was like Etsy. IT WAS AWESOME.

Luckily most of the stuff on display was geared towards children (clothing) and the other stuff was way out of my budget even though I saw some very cool things and appreciate the craftsmanship. I did come away with a couple of funky brooches which I haven’t taken a picture of yet, but I will.

We wandered around the city and snapped pictures, sampled beers and food, and well that’s about it. It was meant to be a do-nothing-much weekend and that’s what we did. I’ll be uploading my pictures a bit slowly so I can post them here so get ready for some picture heavy posts.

Welcome to the bad news blog…

I went away to Brussels, had a great time until late-Sunday night when I came down with the worst case of food poisoning I have ever had. I was sick the entire night and next day. I was stable enough to travel home Monday afternoon, but it was a miserable journey. I managed to sleep between Brussels and London, but the train from London to home was rather crowded and I couldn’t do anything but stare out to the horizon so as not to feel like I’d puke into the lap of the man sat next to me. I had a big meeting yesterday morning so I attended that, but took the afternoon off to get some rest. I woke up this morning with a bit of relapse so I took today off too.

Before I left I had made an appointment to take Trigger in first thing on Tuesday as I could see her tumour had rapidly grown in the last couple of weeks. It was clearly bothering her a lot as she pawed at it so much that she made it raw and was acting very skittish — something she never did before. When I made the appointment I said I think she will need sedation so they can do X-rays and a proper exam since her last one was back in November or something.

When the vet saw her he agreed and asked me in what order I noticed the change in symptoms and behaviour. He said what I already knew — that the cancer was in such a place that there was little to do surgically or even with aggressive therapies like chemo or laser. He said that it may be likely that they’d sedate her and see that the cancer was at such a stage as the best course would be to let her go…

I had to let my little kitty go yesterday. The tumour had spread so much and there was nothing they could do. She’d only get worse and any treatments they could give her wouldn’t really help.

I knew this was coming so I am not as devastated as I was with losing Dakota so unexpectedly last year which actually makes me feel like a bit of an arse. It’s very lonely not having a kitty here to headbutt me and tell me when it’s time to go to bed or insist that she come in the bathroom with me so she can have a drink out of the tap. I don’t need to be careful about kicking the water bowl…

I’m ready for this part of my life to move forward. I have had way too much loss in the last 12 months; way too much upheaval.

RIP Trigger kitty.

Please ignore the cat fur. Everything in my flat is covered in cat fur and it is impossible to get rid of it. As un-environmentally friendly tumble dryers are, I really miss having one and as soon as I actually have the space I will get a basic VENTED one to help wick away the cat fur from things like sheets, towels, blankets, duvet covers, etc. on occasion.

Anyway, that’s Dream in Color Classy in Gothic Rose. Definitely doesn’t sound like the sort of colour I’d normally go for… rose!? But it is very nice. Deep, rich burgundy with a whole slew of complementary colours. I am going to attempt to knit another cardigan. I knit a swatch last weekend (see above) and washed it only to release that I couldn’t find my pins to block it. I bought some more, not as nice, but 3x the price!, and blocked. My gauge is off by one-half to one-full stitch. I think it should be okay because the weight and a better blocking should sort that out. I probably won’t actually cast on for a couple weeks as I’m really busy this week and have a sock or two to keep me occupied.

I’ve got some work travel this week which I’m not looking forward to really as it requires getting a train at stupid-o’clock which means waking up at even-stupider-o’clock. However, I am taking some time off to go to Brussels for the weekend so that will be loads of fun plus a guaranteed 10-12 hours of knitting time. Hopefully I should be able to accomplish SOMETHING in that time.

Several of us met up yesterday for a knitting group. I cycled and decided to try to avoid the roads. I apparently can’t follow directions if they do not involve roads. I went way out of my way and had an adventure. I made it and managed to knit and have turned the heel and started on the cuff for the Kansas Harvest sock. I feel rather clever for figuring out how to make the grain bits of the pattern not appear upside down since I’m knitting toe-up… I’ll share that later although it really is dead simple. Before we were done knitting it started chucking down with rain. It let up enough that I dashed out in it and managed not to get too wet. It rained the rest of the day and into the night. Today we’ve got 30mph winds…

I wish I had some nice pictures from the gardens to share with you, but the rain drove me away before I could take any. After next weekend I’ll definitely have some pictures to show you and hopefully some will involve actual knitting.

Have a happy week!

As in crazy, not angry.

I finished the memorial scarf, but don’t have a finished picture since 1. It’s a scarf so it’s rather boring to photograph again and 2. I just don’t, okay? It’s nice and thick. I haven’t actually washed it yet as there really is nowhere for me to lay it out to dry without it being totally in the way (my flat is that small).

I have started on some new socks - the Kansas harvest socks (Ravelry link) using the MadelineTosh sock yarn I got in a trade. As I’m knitting them toe up I hope the wheat sheaf bits don’t look too funky being upside down.

I want to start a larger project and I even swatched! I washed the swatch and then realised I don’t know where my pins and what not are to properly block it and measure. My guess is is that everything would be fine if I were to just get on and knit (based on how the yarn behaved post-bath and the difference in my gauge pre-wash), but I want to be sure before diving head first into this one because I really want to finish a larger project!

Other than that not a lot going on. I looked into moving out of my flat early and it really wouldn’t be financially feasible because of the rental market right now. I would be responsible for rent, bills, and marketing fees until the end of my tenancy agreement or until a new renter could be found. Considering half of this building is still empty it’s pretty clear I’d be obvious for all the above. Oh well. At least I tried, right? I am keeping my eye out for new places to live as things are starting to show up that are available in a couple months time. I have actually toyed with the idea of buying, but right now I’m mostly leaning towards “not a good idea”.

As always I am way behind with blog reading. I have been doing as my body says and getting lots of sleep including naps after work and lots of them at the weekend. I’ll go catch up a bit while my dinner is cooking…

Boy howdy, I just can’t keep up with blog posts (it doesn’t help that I’ve added a few new blogs to my reader) nor my emails. I’m really sorry, it’s on my to-do list this weekend because it’s only polite to return a note to nice comments.

Trigger was back at the vet this morning — totally unamused as it required an antibiotic injection since the oral medication was making her sick (and me stressed). I’ll have to take her back in a couple of weeks if things don’t look better although I suspect they will since the few days of antibiotic she got orally already helped the infection. Otherwise her next scheduled visit will be in July for her annual shots and probably some blood work to see how things are going in her system — maybe some X-rays to determine the extent the tumour has grown. *Sigh* The vet used the words “palliative care” today which made me cringe even though I’ve known that that was the case since she was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma last autumn. I just don’t like how familiar I am with palliative care these days.

In other news, my knitting progress is stalling. I am desperate to be knitting, but I keep getting distracted by the internet or other things (good things). There are a few things I am chomping at the bit to knit though. One is the which is an adult version of that famous Zimmerman sweater. FlintKnits has provided a free pattern for it. The other is a Lizard Ridge blanket for my mom. I like version 2 and think it would suit my mom’s tastes — and the version seen at sock pr0n is nice too - 4 long panels. I’d really like to do it in the natural colourway (pictured at right) as that would also be more appropriate to her tastes and I think would be really classy and timeless. It seems as though that colourway is no longer really made although I have found enough in stock in a few places, but monetary constraints right now will have to put that purchase on hold. She had previously shown me a Lion Brand pattern she liked, but I think she’d really dig this one. I also found a cute sock pattern, Impressionist socks, and god knows I’ve got enough sock yarn!

Other than all that, no real plans for the weekend. I think I’ll be catching up on some sleep as I think the combination of stress and a lot of meetings this past week wore me out more than I realised. I’ve also done a ton of walking, but now that I’ve got my bike back all tuned and ready, I’ll hop on that and go for a ride.

Hope you’re all having nice, relaxing weekends!

The picture up top is from a Roman statue in the Bardo Museum (can’t find an English version) in Tunis, Tunisia. I went on holiday there three years ago. Official website is here.

I’m calling it the Memorial Scarf. It’s what I’m making with the Cascade Pastaza Paints that I bought that reminded me of my sister. Unfortunately that picture makes it look a bit more like army fatigues, but it’s much richer and brighter. In reality, the pattern is the Yarn Harlot’s One row handspun scarf.

I’ve found someone to carpool with which means right now I’m not knitting as much again because on the bus I’d get my knitting out pretty much the minute I got on and put it away just before I got off so it was a solid 45 minutes of knitting. Right now I am being more social and conversing with the kind people I carpool with, but I may have to break out the knitting because I sure do appreciate the progress I can make on things during that commute time.

Also, I am so anxious for Sockapalooza 5 to start! I have no idea why since it is actually rather stressful what with having to select a yarn and pattern suitable to your sockpal and the deadline… I hope it rolls on soon!

Tomorrow one of my friends (also former co-workers) will be here for a meeting on Friday so I’m looking forward to that little catch up. Also another knitting meetup although I will have to duck out early to meet my friend (he doesn’t knit).

Edited to add:
Saw this announcement via Ysolda’s blog. Click on the advertisement link to find out a bit more. Roll on 1st August!.

Yesterday my sister would have celebrated her 31st birthday. I was glad it was a Friday and a work day because I think I would’ve sat and dwelled on it a lot otherwise. I was also fortunate that due to an illness earlier in the week, my part-time coworker actually worked on Friday and I didn’t have to sit in the office by myself. My mom took the day off and headed north for the weekend to spend it with her friend who lost her son in an accident about 15 years ago. I’m sure there has been much wine drinking.

I wanted to write a post about it yesterday, but I really didn’t know what to say other than I really miss her and know all these firsts are going to be really tough.

As for myself, I’m taking it easy. After a busy day on Thursday that involved finding someone to see for grief counselling and a physiotherapy appointment, I found myself on two new walks home that were just stunning. This area is so beautiful that I’m contemplating my decision to move closer to work… I took my bike in this morning for a tune-up and will get it back Monday. I realised how much I actually miss cycling and how much better it makes me feel so I am going to just suck it up and find my way around, hills be damned.

I visited the Durham Cathedral last weekend during the long weekend. You aren’t allowed to take photos inside and I didn’t even feel like I could take any sneaky ones since it was so busy. I did climb up the tower which was more tiring than I expected. 300+ steps that wind round and round and get narrower and narrower. It was very windy on top of the tower, but the views were beautiful. FYI The picture at the very top is of the Cloisters.

After I was done visiting the Cathedral I went and sat in a quiet little garden around the back of it and started knitting. Every bench was taken when I arrived and five minutes later there was an exodus… hope it was just ’cause it was lunch time. An older couple was leaving and the woman stopped and cooed and said “You don’t see that much these days! Can I have a look?” She reached out and touched the sock I was knitting and said “Aren’t you clever! That’s gorgeous.” It was nice to be complemented. I didn’t stay for much longer as a family arrived with children who weren’t ready to sit still and eat lunch.

We’re having another lovely weekend and it’s definitely going much faster than I’d like. It’s still very light out so it’s a bit deceiving as to how much of the weekend is already gone.

I could have surprised myself by truly finishing these before the end of the 3-day weekend. I mean it would have been a skin-of-the-teeth sort of finish, but still. However, I did not because that would have meant not having any knitting to do on the commute as I totally didn’t expect to get to the point of finishing so I saved some ribbing, the binding off, and perhaps even the weaving in of ends for the commute.

Now unless you do two socks at once or are extremely meticulous, socks one and two are never quite the same.

Sock one:

• Did my normal toe-up cast on instead of the crochet cast on as indicated in the pattern; this means it sits a bit funny since the pattern twists.
• Foot came out about a quarter inch too long so it’s actually a bit baggy.
• Remarkably I “made up” the bind off, thinking I was doing it as I have done before, but not so… I thought I was doing the Russian bind off, but what I did was k2, slip first stitch over, move remaining stitch back to left needle, rinse and repeat.
• I only got in 11 rounds of ribbing at the top of the cuff.
• I used 56g of yarn.

Sock two:

• Still didn’t do the crochet cast on, but did a provisional cast on and more or less did as the pattern stated. The toe is too pointy…
• Foot is nearly perfect (sans pointy toe)
• Actually did the Russian bind off
• Did 16 or so rounds of ribbing and could have done several more before binding off (probably due to savings in the foot length department).
• Usd 52g of yarn.

On both socks I used 2.25mm needles for the toe and switched to 2.5mm once the pattern started yet one pooled the whole way up and the other did different things on the foot and cuff. After the last pair of socks that required ripping back quite a bit, I did try these on to determine how many stitches to reduce back down to after the gussets. Since I’m not clever enough to figure out how to actually incorporate decreases into patterns, I just reduced the needle size back to 2.25mm and it worked like a charm once I was sure the sock would get over my instep and ankle and not be restricting.

I definitely could’ve done a better job of picking up the stitches on the second sock heel flap so I might go and reinforce those somehow. Not sure why this happened, the only explanation is because I was in the pub.

As for what’s next, well I think I will work on some of those other socks that need a mate or need working on in general and start on a scarf.